Truly Bad Films

Monday, January 09, 2006

Ashlee Neck & Neck With Paris for World Cup Stank 'Ho Award

Hey peeps - you probably don't pay any more attention than grocery check-outs demand to those International Gals of Skankery, Paris, Jessica and now, Ashlee. Sophie, AKA Agent Bedhead, updates us that competition against Paris in the World Cup Stank 'Ho Award has just heated up with Ashlee Simpson's entry into the Sex Tapes category.

The only reason Ashlee is on my mind this week is because Red mentioned seeing Ashlee's creepy dad on t.v. and it sounded like a Father Simpson Narcissi-Fest. Also, I was horrified when I recognized her on the current cover of Cosmo.



I do not have the fashion sense to truly Fug the gal, but even I can see how awful that dress looks on her. To begin with, white is not her color, but in any color this dress would be fug-ulous. It looks like something Suzanne Pleshette wore to serve cocktails on the Bob Newhart Show back in 1972 - and it probably looked great on Suzanne with her panache, even though it eliminates the waistline and accentuates breast droop. Let's call it a nightie-mare. Rachel Carson meets Fredricks of Hollywood, let's say.

Also, Ashlee is just not cover-girl pretty. She's got great eyes but her nose is broad. Don't think that I'm falling into line with the nose surgery crowd that wants everyone to look the same. I'm not. It's just that I could find ten women in ten minutes right outside my door who are prettier than Ashlee Simpson. Plus, the blonde doesn't work with her skin tone. IMO, it makes her look the desperate Paris wanna be that she is. The whole world knows now that she can't sing. So, tell me again - what is her claim to fame?

Maybe that's the way she felt too. And she said to herself, "I know! I'm a gonna get me some of them sex tapes like Paris. Daddy, get on in here and hold the camera!"

2 Comments:

At 4:49 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

In the words of the BaHa Men,"Who let the Stanky Hos out?"

 
At 8:42 PM, Blogger null said...

Oh wow. I never thought of the cameraman angle. EWWWWW.

 

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