Truly Bad Films

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Bluetooth Cranium

While we're grinding up our old Gateway desktop CPUs, let's slip on our Bluetooth-enabled snowboarding jackets and enjoy the great outdoors! There's a control panel in the sleeve that let's you switch between your iPod and your cell phone. The hood features speakers and a microphone.

As an expansion of the ugly tattoo theme I introduced the other day, I was thinking about ugly piercings I have known. Of the two that came to mind, both were nose piercings that went through the side of the nose (not the septum). Both girls had less-than-average looking noses. GirlOne chose to wear a small gold rosebud, which, from a distance of more than 6 inches, looked like a pert, shiny booger. GirlTwo wore a flat silver disc the size of a pinhead. This came across as an overlooked implant Star Trek doctors failed to remove after they rescued her from the Borg. (Note to anyone considering a facial piercing - do NOT adorn your ugliest feature. An ugly nose with a gilded booger is now an ugly nose no one can ignore!)

I guarantee you that in less than 10 years it'll be the rage in the 15 to 25 demographic to get the speakers and mike implanted directly in the head. They'll shave their eyebrows and have logos installed instead. Afterall - why spend the money unless you can brag about it? Piercings will no longer be expensive but pointless hardware. They'll be wireless upgrades to the human base kit. And our parents complained about long hair!

Your 5 year old sitting there busy with her Etch-A-Sketch today, will shortly be whining for an iSkull 'cause Britney's mom let her already get ooooooone! My advice - just be happy it doesn't look like a booger and roll with it.

Update: More music-enabled fashion. My pal Aaron found iPod enabled Levis, of all things. He calls his post on the subject Playing iPocket Pool.

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